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Ahem,
03.04.03 - 4:41 p.m.

I have bad breath right now, which is delicately reminiscent of the garlic from the cilantro chutney that I dipped my sandwich into at lunch, which I nibbled on slowly because I was convinced that the one little pita couldn't sate my incredible appetite - since I hadn't eaten all day due to the nausea, which resulted from lack of sleep, I experienced when I got up in the wee morning hours, and then had to go to work immediately - and I couldn't purchase another sandwich because I lacked the funds and am too chagrinned to borrow dollars from friends because I dislike admitting the lack a certain self-autonomy, though SK, that dear, is unhesitant to help out, which she's demonstrated in the past by lending me money so I can continue to indulge in my little lunches where I can sit primly at the chipped cherry wood tables on the second floor coffee shop and rambled on at length on my vice/obsession/cause of the day, which today, happens to be the Anti-War Campaign, a good cause since politics has a certain semi-glamorous quality, and can be empowering and entertaining, at least on a college level, therefore it definitely behooves the average student to get involved, even though it may not yield the beautiful and all-encompassing life goal that I crave, but that doesn't matter since I now doubt the existence of something pure, since the concept of purity falls outside the realm of human nature and society, which is so diverse that the self-interest of each individual corrupt and adulterate all collective efforts and entities, so thus, I find it more worthwhile - at least right now, I mean, ideas and philosophies are always going to change, and I have no doubt that my present views will evolve into something totally different, and I applaud this because the very basis of progress comes from this destruction of old ideas and the birth of the new from its ashes, and though this constant deconstruction and reconstruction does breed repetitiveness, there are new ideas and perspectives being presented, and conscientious thought is encouraged, which is, after all, the most important thing - to focus on the easier and more immediate tasks at hand, the tasks that are more obvious, with more obvious solutions, which is why I am cutting out all the bullshit and higher stratums of philosophic thought, and abandoning the pursuit of profound earth-rupturing, ass-cramping paradoxes and epiphanies, because in the pursuit of ideals, one gets lost and disillusioned, so by doing away with them, I have freed myself for action, so I search for a toothbrush.

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